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Thursday, January 29, 2009

Hand Me a Clock?



Reality TV has been suggested to me a MULTITUDE of times; however, never quite as OFFENSIVE as what I'm about to tell ya.


I was having, what seemed to be, a perfectly normal conversation with my current love interest. Real Chance at Love was on my television. (It wasn’t doing a very good job of keeping my attention, I might add). That’s when he said it! “Why don’t you go on one of those”?



WTF?????????


Did I miss something?

So I investigate further by asking “WHY on EARTH would I need to do that”? He responds, “To get your blog going”?

Are we serious? Really? Now I know that Patent and I are the only folks that comment on our blog BUT we’ve only given the address to one person.




THESE are all things that I’d rather do than EXPLOIT myself and family because I want attention:


NOT blog while at work

Pay my taxes

Eat with Anthony Bourdain

Go on tour with Souljah Boy

BUY a Souljah Boy album

DATE Souljah Boy

Vote Republican

Count my eyelashes

Pay child support

Pay spousal support

Take out the trash

Bathe in the trash

Loan my vagina to Pam Anderson (she gets it in)

Diet with Nicole Ritchie

NOT blog at work

DO SOME WORK

Clip my grandma’s toenails (she asks)

Befriend Danny Bonaduce

Give up my Blackberry

Keep up with the Jackson’s noses

Keep up with Lil Kim’s noses

Do Jim Jones’ laundry

Piss off Kanye

Ponder life w/ Lil Wayne

Be Bobby Brown



…and that’s just off the top of my head!

UGH!


4 comments:

Traycee06 said...

ok ummm...what in the HALE was he thinking?! i prolly woulda knocked him upside his damn head coming @ me w/ some ish like that.

things I'd rather do than exploit myself on them craptastic ass shows:

answer the phone after my EX friend's BF done beat her ass (well, maybe - i'd really rather NOT do it)

have a heart ta heart w/ my bitch azz boss

kiss lil john in the mouf (YUCK)

walk on a bed of nails

throw rocks at my cousin's window all night (seriously, i'd rather do that anyway)

tell ppl who owed me money that they can keep it (HA!)

clip MY granmama's toe nails (whew girl LMAO)

sit in a NYC DMV (ri-damn-diculous lines)

NAW ON MY OWN DAMN FLESH!!!

Anonymous said...

LOL and what's up w/ the stripper pole pic........been over reading NB site?! LMAO that girl is a trip!

Carmen Cosmopolitan said...

LMAO!

No she has this pic over there?

Cuz that what all those biatches are...SKRIPPAS in waiting

Anonymous said...

LOL no, not the pic...she just had this topic the other day because of an interview that Eva & Lance had did.